MY FINAL GARAGE SALE

How often have you thought a garage sale was a fantastic idea?

Yeah. Me, too.

My PERFECT customer...

So I sat outside in the rain all day yesterday. Was it worth it? Depends.

We made some money. I think…

But then we spent some money on breakfast. Then on lunch…and dinner. Think about it, who cooks on Garage Sale Day? We also bought cute little $1, $3, $5 stickers. And it was a street sale with several families, so there was an ad in the local paper—another $8.

I’m not really sure how much money we will end up with, especially since I agreed to take $1 for the $5-10 items A LOT. Lets face it, I DO NOT want to drag my treasures (crap?) back into the house. Especially when I have just worked so hard to remove them. $1 is better than packing them up and dragging them back down to the basement.

Thankfully I had help. Though my help came in the form of teenagers, who do like to sleep in. Which left just me to manage the 8am Early Bird  Crew who marched down the driveway like a parade. The sale started at 9am.

Some of my favorite garage sale moments…

I sent my daughter and godchild into the house to roll up an area rug that was under the dining room table. Decided I didn’t want it. My son stepped out of the bathroom and saw the girls laboring to move the chairs and table off of the rug.  “Mom, are you gonna sell my liver, too?” He stood there for a minute. Then pointed to a side table, “Look that’s dusty. Time to get rid of it”

My daughter arrived at the sale later in the morning after going to breakfast. She wasn’t around long before I heard, ”I’ll be right back. I think I just got my period.” Later….”Katie, can you please…” She interrupted before I could get the question out. “I’m cramping!!” It’s a good thing she looked cute sitting there. Because that’s mostly what she did.

My godchild’s boyfriend came over. He kindly offered to haul a large area rug (the one that is no longer under the dining room table) to the car for a couple of nice women. We’re going to say they were ‘nice,’ even though they weren’t super friendly. Anyways, he banged his head on the back of their Jeep. The nice women said they do it all the time. Godchild’s boyfriend rubbing his head, “Have you seen my head? It’s BIG. I’m like the Kool Aid Man. My head’s like…40% of my body.” That loosened them up. Barely.

Later when my son arrived back home, I told him that I sold his old bike that was missing one brake and had two flat tires…for $2. He responded with the fake excitement that 14-year-old boys use to mock their mother, “Sweet. You could buy like 8 gum balls with it!!”

As if I care what I can buy with the $2. Somebody just paid me to take a bike—that quite frankly was a piece of junk—out of my one-car garage. There was no downside for me. So what if that person fixes it and makes some money. Good for him. The only thing it has done for me lately was to jab me in the shin with its kickstand, as I walked by.

The garage sale is almost over, which means we are fast approaching The Great Giveaway. That’s the time people can just take what they want. Because, who cares? I’m no longer attached to the items littering the front yard.

I certainly don’t want any of them. I didn’t even know I had them a few days ago. In fact, I wonder why I spent money on some of them in the first place.

It goes without saying that I am NOT having a Garage Sale next year.

And I just put that in writing…

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About Amy Lauria

Artist. Writer. Single Parent of two college students. Beach Walker. Dog owner who walks outdoors to maintain sanity. Into shiny objects, vacations, glitter, cupcakes, sports, and my beloved sticks, stones and beach glass.
This entry was posted in Daily Life of a Single Parent, The best laid plans... and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to MY FINAL GARAGE SALE

  1. Katie says:

    THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH for advertising that I have my period!!! 🙂

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